Top Comedies
Maxim is one of my favorite magazines. They recently had an article called “The 300 Movies You Must See Before You Die”. Below is the list of the comedies that made the cut:
Monty Python and the Holy Grail 1975
The Big Lebowski 1998
Kingpin 1996
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy 2004
Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan 2006
This Is Spinal Tap 1984
Airplane! 1980
Animal House 1978
American Pie 1999
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery 1997
Bachelor Party 1984
Bananas 1971
Beverly Hills Cop 1984
Blazing Saddles 1974
Caddyshack 1980
The Cannonball Run 1981
Clerks 1994
Dazed and Confused 1993
Duck Soup 1933
Dumb & Dumber 1994
Election 1999
The 40-Year-Old Virgin 2005
Ghostbusters 1984
Groundhog Day 1993
Happy Gilmore 1996
Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle 2004
It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World 1963
The Jerk 1979
Modern Times 1936
The Nutty Professor 1963
Office Space 1999
Old School 2003
The Pink Panther Strikes Again 1976
The Princess Bride 1987
Raising Arizona 1987
Sixteen Candles 1984
Some Like It Hot 1959
Trading Places 1983
Vacation 1983
Wedding Crashers 2005
Wet Hot American Summer 2001
Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory 1971
Young Frankenstein 1974
I agree with most of the films on the list, but how could they ignore these classics?
Napoleon Dynamite
There’s Something About Mary
Harold and Maude
Born Yesterday
Annie Hall
Fargo
Fast Times at Ridgemont High
The Seven Year Itch
There isn’t a day that goes by when one of my friends does say one of these memorable lines from Napoleon Dynamite.
Do the chickens have large talons?
But my lips hurt real bad!
Take a look at what I'm wearing, people. You think anybody wants a roundhouse kick to the face while I'm wearing these bad boys?
I see you're drinking 1%. Is that 'cause you think you're fat? 'Cause you're not. You could be drinking whole if you wanted to.
A liger. It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed... bred for its skills in magic.
Gosh!
Lucky!
Cameron Diaz, Ben Stiller and Matt Dillon in There’s Something About Mary... the hair gel scene, franks and beans, the dog and the old lady scene that made me scream out loud in the theater.
Harold and Maude with Ruth Gordon. How could they have missed this one?
Born Yesterday, a classic comedy with Judy Holliday who was one of the best comedic actresses of her time.
Annie Hall- What can I say, this film has Woody Allen and Diane Keaton at their finest. I love the driving scene with Christopher Walken.
Fargo- Do you want the clear coat? You betcha!
Fast Times at Ridgemont High- Sean Penn should have won an Oscar as Spicoli.
The Seven Year Itch- Marilyn Monroe, the fifties and New York City in the summer. When it gets hot like this, you know what I do? I keep my undies in the icebox!
Come on Maxim add these gems to the list!
Posted by Jim on Tuesday, April 29, 2008 @ 9:55 PM
Church of the PO
I usually pay all of my bills online, but occasionally I have to use snail mail to pay the odd company that hasn’t set up automatic payments, send my mom a card, or do anything related to the great state of Georgia. I had a few envelopes to send out this month and I searched my desk for three stamps. I pulled out the book of stamps and as fate would have it there were only two left. I searched the desk again in vain and knew I would have to take the dreaded trip to the post office for one, single, solitary stamp.
The post office is only a mile from my house and they have a stamp machine in the lobby, so I thought this excursion should take 15 minutes tops. Wrong! My first clue was driving up to the place and seeing that there weren’t any parking spaces open. Then it hit me, this was a Saturday the worst day of the week to attempt to go to the post office. I remembered I only had to go to the lobby, put my money in the machine, grab my stamps and get out of there. I strode into the lobby smugly and looked around, the stamp machine was gone! I felt like giving a William Shatner School of bad acting scream, which is falling to your knees while looking up at the gods screaming “no” with upraised clenched fists. I did this in my mind instead, but everyone in line could sense my internal dialog and gestured for me to get in line.
The line was about 15 people deep and moving at a snails pace. We were packed into a room with a line on the floor that couldn’t be crossed until you were summoned. A few people tried to cross before their time and were told to step back in the holding pen for a few additional seconds for their penance. Someone needed to pick up a package and their identification was scrutinized as closely as if they were trying to enter another country.
It seemed that they had chosen the people to work behind the counter based on their ability to work at a surreally slow pace. It was like an art form, there were no sudden or jerking motions, every thing was performed in a serene steady manner. Stamps were thoughtfully placed on the packages and smoothed down in nice even strokes; envelopes were carefully walked one at a time and placed in a basket. It was like watching Tai chi in the park.
Then it hit me, this was the closest I had come to a religious ceremony in years. It was if I was transported back to the Catholic mass of my youth. The humbling of standing in line made me realize I was no better than anyone else. The line on the floor taught me respect and compliance and the procession of the people behind the counter taught me patience. I had come in for a book of stamps and left with so much more.
Posted by Jim on Tuesday, April 29, 2008 @ 9:30 PM
Gluttonous Weekend
My friend Jon came down from DC for a weekend visit. Atlanta is great in the Spring, especially after the pollen has cleared, the weather is warm and the mosquitoes are just a twinkle in their daddy's eye.
I picked him up at the airport on Friday night and we went to Nickemotos for a belly full of sushi before heading to the Star Bar for a night of rockabilly. The Star Bar is in the Little Five Points section of town and used to be a bank before transforming into one of the best rockabilly clubs in the country. The bank vault has been turned into a shrine to Elvis Presley and the bartenders dole out Pabst Blue Ribbon beers where the tellers used to stand.
There was a $10 cover charge for a full night of music. We missed the first band called the Rusty Rebels, but caught the second band Atomic Boogie. These guys were great, a three piece band that consisted of a guitarist who was the lead singer, a drummer and a guy on the stand up bass who stole the show. They got the whole room rocking and the bass player was lying down on the stage still playing by the end of the set. The headliner was Rosie Flores who mixes rockabilly and punk. She does a great version of the Sex Pistols Pretty Vacant. There were some pretty amazing swing dancers in the club, but by the end of the night everyone was out on the dance floor.
The next day we were off to the Inman Park Festival. Inman Park is an intown neighborhood and they have a yearly festival with local artists, musicians, a parade and some of the best food in town. We sampled a few margaritas, some Mexican food and some tasty BBQ ribs while checking out some cool woodwork and metal artists. There was a really cool guy who made knives out of exotic materials. One of the sheaths was made out of stingray skin, another had a handle made out of wooly mammoth tusk and he even did some stuff with chicken feet. Very detailed, intricate work.
Saturday night we went to East Atlanta and had even more food and drinks. We had a dozen raw oysters, some steamed mussels and fried green tomatoes at the Glenwood and fried pickles at the Graveyard. We stopped by The Earl and even went to Mary's for drunken karaoke.
The next day we went to Ria's Bluebird for breakfast. It's little dinner that overlooks Oakland Cemetery and we ordered more food than we could possibly eat. If you ever stop by be sure to get the short stack of pancakes with caramelized bananas….yum! We drove past Cyclorama on the way back to my place and decided to stop in. They have a huge mural which is over 40 feet high that depicts the Battle of Atlanta during the Civil War. The room rotates and the battle is narrated while you view all 360 degrees of the painting.
I finally dropped Jon of at the airport on Sunday afternoon. I'm sure we were at least 10 lbs. heavier than when we started on Friday night. That's what Atlanta is all about, good food, music and friends and hopefully all three at the same time.
Posted by Jim on Sunday, April 27, 2008 @ 8:25 PM
Skank of Love
I was channel surfing the other night and turned on VH1 hoping to watch some music videos. I don't know what I was thinking because I can't tell you the last time I saw an actual music video on either MTV or VH1. Instead they had a reality show on called "Rock of Love" with Bret Michaels of Poison. Reality shows always have some sort of prize to offer the winner, but the best I could tell was the prize was Bret Michaels and several girls were vying for his affections. Ooooh, one of these skanks could win the heart of a washed up hair band singer who has committed the cardinal hair band sin and lost most of his hair? He has an array of bandanas and cowboy hats that he wears in various combinations, but who is he trying to fool? No guy covers his head 24/7 unless he is balding and trying to hide it.
There were a variety of women on the show, but stripper seemed to be the most common occupation amongst the group. It was very convenient that they had a stripper pole and an unending supply of liquor in the house. On the first night one girl got so trashed that she couldn't even make it to the elimination ceremony. I bet her parents were proud when they saw her puking on national TV. There was a stripper from France who had augmented every part of her body except for her brain and another one from the Ukraine that could possibly have been a male. Another girl was married and had restraining orders on her last two husbands and there were a couple of women who seemed to be about my mom's age.
By the second show half of the girls were in love with Bret and fighting amongst each other for his affections. There were stupid completions to win a date with Bret. Football in a muddy field, which I have to say wasn't too bad to watch, catching a greased pig, ATV racing, rodeo riding and roller derby racing with a doll? What was that all about?
One by one the skanks are eliminated by either getting a backstage pass or not. We get to meet their past boyfriends who seemed to be on the show to promote their lame bands and finally their parents are brought on. Now everyone in your hometown knows your daughter works the pole. That's OK; it looks like mom may be familiar with the pole as well. That's nice; they are keeping the family tradition.
Finally we are down to the last few contestants and they are off to Mexico for a romantic weekend. Gee, I wonder if anyone can tell if they comped the room in exchange for free advertising? Maybe they can show the hotel logo one more time? The last two girls fight with each other and sleep with Bret. Now he has to choose his skank of love…who will it be? Daisy another highly augmented stripper with grouper-like lips or Amber the 40 something talk show host with skunk striped hair.
Do you think I'm going to tell? I had to suffer through this miserable show and if you want to find out who won, then you are going to have to do the same.
Posted by Jim on Thursday, April 24, 2008 @ 1:48 PM
3 Days Texas & Music
The schedule was released a couple of months out from the Austin City Music Festival. Muse, Cold War Kids, Amy Winehouse, Paolo Nuttini, Arctic Monkeys, Arcade Fire, Augustina, Damion Rice, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah, Regina Spektor, The Decemberists, Yo La Tengo, My Morning Jacket, Bjork, The White Stripes, The Killers, Joss Stone, Kaiser Chiefs, Peter Bjorn and John, Queens of the Stone Age, Spoon, Wilco, Steve Earle, Bob Dylan and a bizillion other bands that I had heard little or nothing about were playing the festival. Emails started flying around between me and my friends…Who is in? Which days? Drive or fly? Does anyone know someone we can stay with?
We decided to go for the entire 3 days and had no Texas connections, so we had to book a hotel. Little did we know that everyone books a nearby hotel months in advance. We ended up staying on the North side of town in a spa type hotel that seemed like a regular hotel to me except they had herbs planted around the place.
We got in on Thursday night and cruised around downtown. We heard that everyone meets at the Congress St. bridge at sunset and waits for bats to fly out from under the bridge. The bats must have been as stoned as the crowd because we didn’t see anything happen, but we did hook up with some cute girls from N.C. that were there for the festival. We club hopped with them until the end of the night when they all the sudden told us had boyfriends back home.
The next day we got up at the crack of noon and drove down to the festival. There is no lot to park in, so we parked at a bike shop about a mile away and took a pedi-cab to the concert. These guys work their butts off! It’s like a rickshaw attached to a bike and these guys pedal everyone around in like 100 degree heat.
No one told me how hot it is in Texas in September! Seriously, it was abut 100 degrees and there was absolutely no shade. We wondered around for a while, but there was no one on stage that we had heard about until later in the day and then everyone we wanted to hear played at the same time. Amy Winehouse and the White Stripes canceled at the last minute, but we saw Peter, Bjorn and John, Joss Stone, Queens of the Stoneage and The Killers the first night.
The second day we decided to go later because we were a little hung over and didn’t want to deal with the midday heat again. All the girls were going crazy over Paola Nuttini, but I didn’t se the big deal about him. Cold Ward Kids, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah and Arctic Monkeys were good, but Muse really blew me away. They had the audience in a high energy trance and were the best performers of the entire festival.
The last day we got there even later. We found a place called Barton Springs that was within walking distance and the water was freaking cold, but felt great. I wish we would have know about this place on the first day. We saw Regina Spektor, The Decemberist and Wilco and had lost out mojo and decided to leave early before seeing Bob Dylan.
This year I know to book a hotel early and to go to the springs during downtime. I also know to ask girls upfront if they have boyfriends before paying for a whole night of drinks.
Posted by Jim on Wednesday, April 23, 2008 @ 10:36 AM
Texting
Have you ever received a text message from one of your hip and trendy friends and it is filled with so many text abbreviations that you have no idea what they are saying?
WYSIWYG SWALK translates to What You See Is What You Get - Sealed With A Loving Kiss
I can understand when a letter is substituted for the word it sounds like. For example B for be, C for see, R for are, U for you, and Y for why and so on. The number substitution is also acceptable 8 for ate, 4 for for and 2 for to.
We all know ROTFL is Rolling on floor laughing, but they have gone too far with the variations on this one.
ROFLCOPTER Rolling on floor laughing and spinning around
ROFLMAO Rolling on the floor, laughing my *butt* off
ROTFLUTS Rolling on the floor laughing unable to speak
The ones that really get me are the way emotions are displayed in text chat. It takes the same amount of characters to write sad as it does to symbolize it.
Happy/Smiley - :-)
Angry - :-||
Very happy - :-))
Confused - %-)
Tongue tied - :-&
Sad - :-(
Saintly - O:-)
Laughing - :-D
Crying - :'-(
Surprised/shocked - :-O
Screaming - :-@
Kiss - :-*
Pig - :@)
Clown - *:-)
Wink - ;-)
Do we really need to know these?
Posted by Jim on Tuesday, April 22, 2008 @ 9:59 PM
The worse the décor the better the music
I have a theory, the worse the décor the better the music. The Earl in East Atlanta is no exception to that rule. A dingy little hole in the wall with peeling paint and a non-existent air-conditioning system make for the perfect music venue. Sweaty bodies packed tightly all dancing to incredible music.
I love odd music and when I heard Los Straightjackets were playing in Atlanta I had to go. We got there a little early because the second part of my theory is that dive bars have the best food. The Earl has been voted best burger in Atlanta a few years running and I love the Guac Burger. A hot, juicy burger with real cheddar cheese and guacamole, a mound of shoestring French fries and a cold beer…heaven!
After filling my belly with a pound of grease I’m ready to hit the dance floor. You enter the concert area through a dark hallway, pay admission and open the doors and enter a dark, smoky cave of a room pulsing with music. Every girl has jet black hair, heavy eyeliner and tattoos, I get the feeling that I just missed a Betty Page look-a-like contest.
The Iguana’s are playing and the crowd on the dance floor is about my parent’s age. I am immediately drawn to one of the worse dancers I have ever seen. She is a middle aged woman who obliviously twitching to a beat that isn’t coming from the band. Every 30 seconds or so she seems to convulse and her arms and legs flail around hitting everyone in a 10 foot radius. I look over next to me and Big Sandy, the lead singer for Los Straightjackets is also entranced by her dancing.
A quick break and Los Straightjackets hit the stage. The band is dressed like IBM executives from the 1960’s. Dark, narrowly cut suits, white shirts, thin black ties and Mexican wrestling masks. That’s right, I said Mexican wrestling masks. They start right into a Ventures medley, playing the fastest guitar licks I have ever heard while standing perfectly still.
The Betty Page girls hit the dance floor and I join in. It is impossible to stand still to this music. I am a sweaty mess within 10 seconds. I am dressed in jeans and a T-shirt and can’t imagine how hot the band must be in suits and masks.
Big Sandy, the singer joins the stage. He is a big hulk of a guy who looks like a Mexican Elvis with a jet black pompadour, Las Vegas swagger and tailored suit. Everyone is on the dance floor now. The play list seems like something from a frat house party…Mustang Sally, Black is Black, Gimme a Little Sign, Hang on Sloopy, Lonely Tear Drops, Wild Thing, California Sun, but this is far from frat house music. It is surf guitar music at it’s finest with a twist of the bizarre.
The show ends and we spill out into the parking lot, drenched in sweat and eardrums still pounding. What a great night! I can’t wait to see them again.
Posted by Jim on Sunday, April 20, 2008 @ 10:12 AM
Starlight Drive In
When was the last time you went to drive-in? Probably never since there are only a handful of drive-ins still in existence around the country. Atlanta has the Starlight Drive-In and it’s been in operation since 1949. Beyond showing first run movies 365 nights of the year and holding a weekly flea market they also have several special events a year, like the Soap Box Derby, the Burt-a-thon, Rock N Roll Monster Bash and Drive-Invasion.
The Soap Box Derby is a full day of entertainment for $5 per person. There are bands, food, beer and gnarly soap box crashes, what more could you ask for? Anyone can enter as long as they have the cojones to race their contraption down a steep hill that empties out into wavy, uneven pavement, thus the crashes. Last year some of my favorite’s carts were a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, Smokey and the Bandit, a modified grocery cart and a Homer, Marge, Bart and Lisa seated on a full sized motorized couch. Marge’s beehive was slightly askew by the time they made it down to the end of the hill.
If you are confident enough in your manhood to admit that you think Burt Reynolds is the biggest stud that ever walked the face of the earth than The Burt-a-Thon is the event for you. The event featured a drive-in triple feature of Smokey and the Bandit, Sharky's Machine and White Lightning. The next day there was a scavenger hunt from Atlanta to Texarkana, ending at another drive-in screening of the film and refreshment provided by a semi trailer full of Coors. The winner of the hunt received an actual 1970’s Firebird. I’m sure that puppy came loaded with a Skynrd eight track…turn it up!
This year The Rock N Roll Monster Bash is showing a double feature of Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla and The Werewolf vs. The Vampire Woman. There are also going to be bands, hot rods, burlesque shows and Miss Monster Bash where selected contestants will appear on the stage at the rock and roll monster bash and have one minute to display their special "talent" in front of a celebrity panel of judges. Hmmm, I hope they are “talented”. Some of the bands slated to play this year are Super X-13, Van Heineken, Black Mona Lisa, Spectremen, Los Rudos and Uncle Daddy and the Kissin Cousins. How can you miss with a line-up like that?
The biggest celebration of all is Drive-Invasion. It’s held on Labor Day weekend and is two days and two nights full of bands, muscle cars, dusk til dawn B and Cult Classic movies, corndogs and beer. You can even camp overnight. Last year The Blasters were the headliners and everyone came out in their full rockabilly regalia and danced till they shut the place down.
Even thought the events are great, I still love going to the drive-in on a summer night and watching the latest horror flick. I like to load up the back of the pickup truck with a bunch of pillows, fill up an ice chest with beers and bring a bag of popcorn cooked on a on a stove not in a microwave and head down to the Starlight for a double feature. Wanna go?
Posted by Jim on Friday, April 11, 2008 @ 9:46 AM
The Fuzz
My friend Sean is in a band in Atlanta and I went to go see him practice last night. They were practicing in a warehouse in the Edgewood section of town were his fellow band mate Mitch and his girlfriend have lived and worked for years.
Edgewood was a low income/working class neighborhood until a few years ago, when suddenly all of the intown neighborhoods became hip and trendy. Some people left, others were forced out, a few have stayed, but the neighborhood is loosing its character and is being replaced with beige two story suburban homes for those who can afford to say they hate the suburbs yet build the same bland, safe homes that they are used to in downtown Atlanta.
Mitch isn't one of those folks. He has lived in Edgewood for years in an old dusty warehouse that suits his needs as an artist and a musician. His space is always open for people to stop by for a few hours or even a few days. Band practice is held at the warehouse at least once a week and Friday night was no exception. Spring had finally made its way to Atlanta, the pollen had subsided and everyone was ready to sit outside and enjoy the best time of the year. No bugs, no oppressive heat and nice long evenings in the city too busy to hate, or so I thought.
The guys in the band brought their girlfriends and everyone was hanging out enjoying the music, weather and the break from the stress of work or school. Someone bought a keg of beer and we drank, ate, and talked about politics, families, friends, movies, books and music. It was the first time I had felt truly relaxed all week.
I spoke to Harriet who is Sean's girlfriend. This girl is a throwback to the 1950's, very Audrey Hepburn looking. She has her dark hair pulled back in a pony tail, she is wearing Capri pants, a cardigan and ballet flats. It's not so much how she looks, but the way that she conducts herself that makes me feel that she is from another era. I have never seen this girl have more than one beer at any party and have never seen her drunk or even slightly buzzed. As usual she has her one beer and is standing outside while her boyfriend Sean loads his drum kit into the car. Someone needs to walk past with some equipment and Harriet steps off the curb to let them by. All of the sudden the cops are there issuing her a ticket for drinking in public.
We can only surmise that the new inhabitants to the neighborhood felt threatened by the natives enjoying their non-beige, non-security alarmed space and called the cops. It makes me wonder why they ever left the suburbs in the first place. It's a shame that they took their wrath out at a girl who never caused anyone any harm and has never been anything but kind to everyone around her.
Posted by Jim on Wednesday, April 09, 2008 @ 11:43 PM